Homestuck.XYZ 2.0

The most basic theory to be had would be that at some point trolls reproduced somewhat like humans until the Grub came.... But i got a weirder theory that might be more accurate.

Because the template of their species was a humanoid with binary sexes and the boobs and binary sexes are integral yet vestigal to theri species.

The Hs^2 series seems to have shed some light to how a Sburb species comes into being. A species is born via that hybrid ectobiology machine by taking the Dna of a species and 'adding noise' to it to generate a new species. If that is what Dirk is doing that is theoretically how ALL sburb species are created. Just not so directly. In the Medium we have examples of experimentation and devices, implying that someone or something experiments first to see what kinda species they can make for the game. But the Base is always, Always humanoid.
Hell it might even be that the 'humans' we know, the Alpha and beta kids, aren't actually Human by our standards. Turns out the reason they are so pale and white and are only 'blonde' or 'black haired' is because they were created that way. When they were created the base was human and had minimal ingredients resulting in a species that was human but not truly. Like offshoot human.

Also its my theory that Trolls were made with a humanoid base of some kind, plus bugs, plus lizards and fish, plus a picture of a demon of some kind, and the most important ingredient was Candy Corn!

Also very likely the ectobiology alchemy machine is an in universe metaphor for creature creation. Essentially combining concepts to create a new race, animal, or species, like creating a species of bird that resembles a trex and has a head shaped like a icepick.

In that logic, it would be fun to end up finding out whoever made those species that we already know, like things coming full circle in HS²
One theory that I find interesting if ending up true would be that Rosebot makes the species that became the Horrorterrors, while Dirk makes the cherubs or whatever weird counterpart this whole "Zillyhoo" thing came from. Tho i'm pretty sure he's going to do something horse related so that mostly rules it out I think.

Cr0ssCutter wrote: ↑

Sat Apr 18, 2020 1:25 pm

In that logic, it would be fun to end up finding out whoever made those species that we already know, like things coming full circle in HS²
One theory that I find interesting if ending up true would be that Rosebot makes the species that became the Horrorterrors, while Dirk makes the cherubs or whatever weird counterpart this whole "Zillyhoo" thing came from. Tho i'm pretty sure he's going to do something horse related so that mostly rules it out I think.

It seems extremely likely she is making the horror terror species, or at least something related to them. Actually i think that Cherub's aren't a 'sburb' species at all. One of the commentaries from a recent homestuck book (one of the more serious ones), stated that cherubs are more part of the God frog's physiology, like antibodies and viruses, than anything else, and he had imagined that there were plenty of other akin species.
That would REALLY emphasize why Cherubs were never meant to play sburb, because they are born from the Frogs, not from the sessions.

I am gonna guess and say that Dirk is gonna make a race known as 'demons' that re winged and have hooves feet. Cause he is directly against an 'angel' and 'god' as it were.


I kinda want to know the formula used to make the humans and trolls. Candy corn was 100% used for trolls.

Cr0ssCutter wrote: ↑

Sat Apr 18, 2020 1:25 pm

In that logic, it would be fun to end up finding out whoever made those species that we already know, like things coming full circle in HS²
One theory that I find interesting if ending up true would be that Rosebot makes the species that became the Horrorterrors, while Dirk makes the cherubs or whatever weird counterpart this whole "Zillyhoo" thing came from. Tho i'm pretty sure he's going to do something horse related so that mostly rules it out I think.

I think its possible that the planet they are on IS the origin place of both horror terrors and Cherubs. But for horror terrors they are sburb species made there, and for Cherubs that is where they first appear at then spread across the universe as antibodies and viruses alike. Dirk is latering things by adding a third species.

OH WAIT i suddenly had another thought. What if the likes of the MSPA reader, the problem sleuth type guys, are in fact the base of sapient life?

It's been established that troll girls are violent psychopaths,
so it's just an extra layer of fat to guard their vital organs. The heart and lungs, most specifically.

Shitpost Lizard wrote: ↑

Sun Apr 19, 2020 12:17 am

It's been established that troll girls are violent psychopaths,
so it's just an extra layer of fat to guard their vital organs. The heart and lungs, most specifically.

The real scope of the post is speculating if the ectoalchemy machine is in fact the source of the Trolls themselves and their bizarre and nonsensical state is in reality not because of anything resembling evolution, but because they were artificially created to begin with.

Which seems extremely likely as not only is the intent of rose and dirk to create players, but the entire species of those players. Meaning its possible that the sburb planets are seeded with the species in question. I have even had the hteory that the players are in fact the adams and eves of their species.

thorondraco wrote: ↑

Sun Apr 19, 2020 1:13 am

The real scope of the post is speculating if the ectoalchemy machine is in fact the source of the Trolls themselves and their bizarre and nonsensical state is in reality not because of anything resembling evolution, but because they were artificially created to begin with.

Which seems extremely likely as not only is the intent of rose and dirk to create players, but the entire species of those players. Meaning its possible that the sburb planets are seeded with the species in question. I have even had the hteory that the players are in fact the adams and eves of their species.

I misread the title as "Theories of why trollgirls have boobs."
As in, an invitation.
My b.

I don't think Dirk and Rose created the troll session.
I actually think it goes in the reverse. Humans resemble trolls, because trolls created humans.
But I don't have any other input to contribute on the proposed idea besides that.

I used to wonder if Calliope and Caliborn's session would loop around to create the troll universe if they actually completed it properly without killing each other.

I think its possible that the planet they are on IS the origin place of both horror terrors and Cherubs. But for horror terrors they are sburb species made there, and for Cherubs that is where they first appear at then spread across the universe as antibodies and viruses alike.

Yeah for the cherubs I guess they're an important part of the biology of a universe. But otherwise I'm prett sure I remember the Horrorterrors being the 248 (or more i forgot) players of the session that birthed the Troll's universe, hence all their signs, and that the Squiddles was some sort of subconscious manifestation of knowledge of what the horrorterrors really were before something terrible happened to them and they ended up in the furthest ring, which is supposed to be a space outside of sburb sessions that can connect them through things like the dream bubbles, which i guess why Lord English was in there, since he was presiding over all these sessions with his curse.

Anyway I like the idea of Deltritus being the birth planet of whatever these bits of unknown lore we had in HS, it would be a nice way to perpetuate the oh so loved Weird Plot Shit I came to know Homestuck for, and also to consolidate the events of HS2 in canon, or at least some kind of further bigger scope... Beyond Canon, as one might say

Shitpost Lizard wrote: ↑

Sun Apr 19, 2020 2:57 am

thorondraco wrote: ↑

Sun Apr 19, 2020 1:13 am

The real scope of the post is speculating if the ectoalchemy machine is in fact the source of the Trolls themselves and their bizarre and nonsensical state is in reality not because of anything resembling evolution, but because they were artificially created to begin with.

Which seems extremely likely as not only is the intent of rose and dirk to create players, but the entire species of those players. Meaning its possible that the sburb planets are seeded with the species in question. I have even had the hteory that the players are in fact the adams and eves of their species.

I misread the title as "Theories of why trollgirls have boobs."
As in, an invitation.
My b.

I don't think Dirk and Rose created the troll session.
I actually think it goes in the reverse. Humans resemble trolls, because trolls created humans.
But I don't have any other input to contribute on the proposed idea besides that.

I used to wonder if Calliope and Caliborn's session would loop around to create the troll universe if they actually completed it properly without killing each other.

I feel like the implication is that there is a continued loop, which is why Rose keeps talking about how they ahve to do this session. Though the thing is Dirk is obfuscating her seer powers so we don't know if this is how it much be or if Dirk has hijacked what was supposed to happen. Like yes, a session is supposed to happen on this planet, but someone else is meant to do the prepwork and Dirk decided 'nope imma takin over'. Far as we know they aren't even supposed to be alive anymore at all and Dirk basically saved everyone he could, even if he is an ass about it. So much we don't know.

I think its like an infinity symbol looking thing. While this next timeloop is meant to add to the loop, it has its own path separate from Homestuck itself, which is why it is considered a different story, so we have the Homestuck loop and then this loop. Dirk however has tied this second loop back to homestuck more closely than its meant to.

I will admit things have gotten very complicated if you take into account pesterquest, which i feel is meant to be taken into account. Retcon powers change things and can in fact change things to the point of undoing reality. So that creates further questions in how close the current reality is to the one that John overwrote with his retcon.

Let's add top the confusion by stating this other little aspect. That the 'powers that be' are blind to the Furthet ring and the dreambubbles. Anything involving either of those two, no one with narrative awareness has a fuckin clue about. Meaning that the ENTIRE troll army arc, and even seeing lord english, WE are seeing it but the peeps who supposedly control their reality is blind to it. Less of a factor with it swallowed up but still.... It really makes you wonder wtf is going on in their reality.

tiddy good